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November 2, 2014

Finding the Promised Land

We’ve recently moved to a new apartment. It’s a bit far from San Francisco, but its location is attractive. Even so, Frulwinn noted that this is the fourth place we’ve lived since we moved to California in March of 2011.

I understand her weariness, but I’m not as beleaguered. In fact, I feel I’m getting closer to finding what it is I didn’t know I was looking for. I’ll explain.

While it’s easy to connect dots in hindsight, I can’t help but feel God’s providence in how things have turned out. I had no idea that moving to work at Twitter would provide the only way I’d be able to pay off taxes we’d incur. I’d never have developed the friendship I have with Tav, Fru’s cousin, if we hadn’t lived together and formed that bond. Had we not moved from there to Daly City, I might not have begun wandering Pacifica’s coast and falling in love with California’s natural beauty, nor would I have had the space and solitude to consider my experience as a journey of self-development, strengthening me for self-sufficiency. Even today, as I spent a little time in the Marin Headlands, I came to a fuller awareness of an actual love for California that has been stunted by my difficult relationship with San Francisco.

Thus, finding ourselves living 20 minutes north of where we first started, outside of San Francisco, feels an awful lot like circling around and honing in on the target. I think a lot of life is accepting that everything happens for a reason, determining if that reason is discernible and understanding how long it will take us to discern. I believe we are in California for a reason. That’s a new wrinkle I’m trying to make more sense of, and making sense of it means being somewhat available to gaining new perspectives.

So this move, as with all the others, is a good one—driven by progressive positioning and a desire to better ourselves. I hope it will teach us even more about who we are, what we need, and where we should be. Rather than find a place and conform to it, as so many others, I am committed to finding the place we need to be and that fits us. Luckily, we’re one move closer than before.

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